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robzilla

Blind Dates

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closest to a blind date i get is when you get dragged along by your mate who is keen on a girl but she brings friend with her when he take her out.

is that counted?

 

a wingman :P

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i posted up a blind date once before and someone on here had such a go at me , but ill mention it again.

 

meet up with this chick from picturepoll.com (back when i was 17-18) and she looked hot as in her pics, so we decided to meet up at crown one afternoon, we agreed to meet at the front of sanity and as we have seen pics of each other it would be easy to identify each other..When she arrived she gave me a big grin and she was missing her front tooth so she had this massive gap..then it clicked why in all her pics she never had smile showing teeth.

 

it was so hard to not laugh, as she was pretty as, but the 2nd she opened her mouth it was just yeah, cant explain it.

 

kissing was fun, u could get ur tongue right in there....After chatting all arvo she ended up telling me shes into all this weird stuff and doesnt buy clothes, she makes everything!!! Just wasnt my type.

 

if i adh this situation i wouldnt care... i mean she mightve jsut fell and broke her teeth... its easily replceble... some vineers (sp)

 

although i dont care... to be honest i would be shitting myself laughing soo hard... its a pretty funny moment.

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who is chedder? :blink:

shes a girl but a lota people a few people mistake her for a guy

 

 

She also manages to get into relationships with the goofiest guys, that make for incredibly funny ex bf stories :lol:

hahaha yeah i read it hehe funny girl

 

 

lol.

 

i still dont know who your talking about.

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another offtopic thread to add to the fail list

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another offtopic thread to add to the fail list

not yet. still waiting for Cheddar...

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i dont think hotties need to go on blind dates..

 

you'd be surprised. Its not just ugly people that go on blind dates. I dont know that I'd call myself a 'hottie' but I'm not the worst pickel in the barrel either. People who go on dates aren't always desperate, they just get sick of meeting losers in clubs etc and then a friend goes "hey, I know this guy, he's really cool can I give him your number?" and you go "eh, why not, the most it will cost me is a couple of hours of my time"..

 

and pride...

 

Ok, i've gone on a couple of blind dates, but I've avoided LOTS more. First, you need to understand how these "dates" come about - MY MOTHER !

 

I had a pretty serious relationship that ended badly so I was kinda "out of the game" for a long time and I think mum was starting to stress out that I was going to stay single forever and therefore not produce grandchildren. So she'd find numerous ways to try and hook me up with people.

 

She'd been at me for ages to answer one of those "personals" ads in the newspaper which I flatly refused to do. Anyway one night I went to bed, and when I pulled the quilt back the cordless phone rolled out from under my pillow and wrapped around it was a piece of newspaper. She'd highlighted the men she thought looked the goods and written "just in case you feel like giving it a go. Love you. Mum xox" And this used to go on all the time. And there was one occasion where my grandpa rang up one of the guys in there and gave him my number. And that is totally 100% true but its another story that I dont have time for right now.

 

Anyway, one of my friends said his girlfriends brother had a friend and could he give him my number so I though "eh, it might get mum off my back for a while if I went out with someone so I gave him my number.

We msg'd eachother for a bit on mobile and msn and after about a week of msg'ing n stuff we decided to meet up - hadnt actually spoken to him though.

 

We worked out to meet up at Mosely Square at the Bay - basically it's a big touristy area thats heavily populated and the chance of bumping into someone you know are pretty high. But we were meeting at night so I thought I'd be ok. We'd swapped photos so I had a rough idea of what he looked like, although it was only a head shot and in hindsight that should have set alarm bells off....

 

So, I get there a bit early cos I figured I'd rather be the one already there waiting, not the one walking up with that blank "are you the one I'm meant to be meeting" look on my face, trying not to look like you're meeting a total stranger. It's actually pretty nerve racking. Anyway as I got there I looked around, couldnt see him anywhere I didnt think so I sat down. Out of the corner of my eye though I thought I saw someone wandering around in the shaddows carrying a big box but he looked 'small' so i didnt worry about it. Then I hear this "Jo?" *cleared his throat* "JO?" and it's this guy from the shaddows.

 

I swear to god he would have been 4 foot tall at the most. And he was carring this great big box wrapped in bubble wrap. I felt sick, I really did. He came up to my shoulder. He'd told me he was 5 foot 11 :lol:

 

Anyway we start walking and he goes "oh, I got this from work for you" and it was a big box of cosmetics he got from Jurlique cos he worked in the warehouse and gets to buy stuff cheap.. bla, bla. I tried to not accept it but I gave up in the end and he insisted it only cost him $5. But instead of waiting til we sat somewhere to give it to me, he waits while we're walking along Jetty Rd (main road, lots of pedestrians) so I'm trying to walk, while carrying my handbag and trying to un-wrap this box which is covered in bubble wrap ON THE OUTSIDE which as I'm un-ravelling it, it's flowing in the breeze around me and over me and behind me like I'm wearing a cape, but I cant just let it fly off into the wind cos there are too many people around. The whole time he's talking and he had a really high pitched voice, alot like a jockey, you know how they have high voices, and he goes "I probably should have told you how tall I really was huh. I'm pretty much like a jockey eh" I just mumbled "yeah, well you should off" but I was too busy opening this stupid box. People are staring at us because I'm struggling to control the box, he's tiny and wearing Jeans, sneakers and a dinner jacket - like a mini Jerry Seinfeld - and talking with his squeaky little voice. I was worried that if we walked much further his legs would wear out and I'd have to carry him.

 

Finally we stop at this coffee shop and I get to open the rest of the box and its got all these cosmetics and creams and stuff in it - some of the stuff was really nice - but then it had this great big pink bag which I was going to leave in the box but no, had to get it out then and there to check it out, and lo and behold, inside the great big pink bag is an even bigger pink sarong !! So I had to get it out, look at it, un fold it, say how nice it was... It was awful. People were looking at us, he's going on about cosmetics and I just wanted to run to the car and get out of there.

 

The funny bit was when we got the coffees the girl takes his order, then looks at me to take mine and goes "so that's all together?" and he goes "No, i'm not paying for hers !" with this semi-surprised tone in his voice like how on earth could she think he would be paying for my coffee. He had no quarms giving me a giant box of cosmetics but refuses to pay for the coffee :lol::lol: . Didnt bother me though. I'd rather pay for my own stuff then you dont feel like you owe them anything.

 

We had a coffee and talked etc for about 30 mins then I said I had to go. I asked where he as parked and he goes "that way" so I said I was parked the opposite direction and he goes "ok, I'll walk you to your car". Of course I was lying wasnt I, so now I had to back peddle out of that and pretend I forgot where I parked. All I could think of when we were walking back was what on earth would I do if he tried to kiss me !! Luckily that didnt happen and I jumped in my car and took off.

 

It was an hour and a half of my life I'll never get back but I guess it wasnt too bad. Atleast he wasnt a jerk.

 

I'll post more later cos I have HEAPS of stories

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:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

 

Its even better when you actually know where she is talking about, because I can just imagine you walking down Jetty Rd with everyone around looking at you strangely :lol:

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She'd been at me for ages to answer one of those "personals" ads in the newspaper which I flatly refused to do. Anyway one night I went to bed, and when I pulled the quilt back the cordless phone rolled out from under my pillow and wrapped around it was a piece of newspaper. She'd highlighted the men she thought looked the goods and written "just in case you feel like giving it a go. Love you. Mum xox" And this used to go on all the time. And there was one occasion where my grandpa rang up one of the guys in there and gave him my number. And that is totally 100% true but its another story that I dont have time for right now.
:lol: :lol: :lol: your family sounds like fun, if I ever have kids, I'm going to pull this stuff on them all the time

 

LOL@blind dating a reject jockey, were you laughing at him or were you too embarrassed? It wouldn't be bad if he was honest, but your just asking to be laughed at doin that. You should have taken the bubble wrap and left the cosmetics, bubble wrap is way cooler than cosmetics

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She'd been at me for ages to answer one of those "personals" ads in the newspaper which I flatly refused to do. Anyway one night I went to bed, and when I pulled the quilt back the cordless phone rolled out from under my pillow and wrapped around it was a piece of newspaper. She'd highlighted the men she thought looked the goods and written "just in case you feel like giving it a go. Love you. Mum xox" And this used to go on all the time. And there was one occasion where my grandpa rang up one of the guys in there and gave him my number. And that is totally 100% true but its another story that I dont have time for right now.
:lol: :lol: :lol: your family sounds like fun, if I ever have kids, I'm going to pull this stuff on them all the time

 

LOL@blind dating a reject jockey, were you laughing at him or were you too embarrassed? It wouldn't be bad if he was honest, but your just asking to be laughed at doin that. You should have taken the bubble wrap and left the cosmetics, bubble wrap is way cooler than cosmetics

 

 

and the fact that he insisted it only cost him $5 has to be a big turn off for a girl... you dont admit you are a tight ass.. god damn some people are stupid.

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Ha ha... oh Cheddar :lol: Another great story hehe.

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:lol: Dan... it was just towards the beginning of summer - not quite day light savings yet but getting close enough to it to start drawing crowds down there. And you're right, I couldnt believe he told me how that box of cosmetics only cost $5... and then refuses to pay for coffee?? good god ! :lol:

 

Judas - I was so embarassed I could have crawled into a crack in the ground. People were looking at us soooo strangely. With that "are they together??" look on their faces. But if he had told me he was so short before hand I wouldnt have met up with him. I can just imagine the look on my face when I saw him. I just couldnt disguise the shock :wacko: !

 

And my family are real funny... when they're not YOURS ! :P

 

I need to start yet another thread on stupid things your family has done.. In fact, I might do that tomorrow unless someone starts it for me *smiles at robzilla*

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:lol: Dan... it was just towards the beginning of summer - not quite day light savings yet but getting close enough to it to start drawing crowds down there. And you're right, I couldnt believe he told me how that box of cosmetics only cost $5... and then refuses to pay for coffee?? good god ! :lol:

 

Judas - I was so embarassed I could have crawled into a crack in the ground. People were looking at us soooo strangely. With that "are they together??" look on their faces. But if he had told me he was so short before hand I wouldnt have met up with him. I can just imagine the look on my face when I saw him. I just couldnt disguise the shock :wacko: !

 

And my family are real funny... when they're not YOURS ! :P

 

I need to start yet another thread on stupid things your family has done.. In fact, I might do that tomorrow unless someone starts it for me *smiles at robzilla*

 

*subscribes*

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/me *bows down to cheddar* you definitely have better stories :P lol

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one more and then I'm going to bed.

 

Now, I dont know how it happens but I really seem to find people who are just plain strange.

 

This other blind date I went on, with a guy called Grant. My mum reminded me about it when I was telling her about this thread. She said "I hope youre not saying anything about me on that site thing".. I said "no mum".. :rolleyes:

 

 

Anyway, I was meeting this guy in town at the end of Rundle Mall (again, only really the SA people will appreciate this) where there is a big hungry jacks on the corner and it's a common meeting place as its easy to find.

 

I was on one side of the traffic lights and he was on the other. Again - I had a photo but they were proving to be not so accurate so I didnt hold much faith in it.

 

I saw him leaning on the window of HJ's and he must've realised who I was so he started crossing the road. I have NEVER seen anyone walk like he did. It was kind of like his feet were in grooves in the road because he seemed to 'slide' across the road without really moving. As in, his upper body would kind of move backwards & forwards as it does when you walk but i swear his feet nevet came off the ground. I though it was odd is all. When I was walking along side of him I couldnt help but start doing the same thing. Like we were sliding along to some in-audible beat in a forward moon-walk style. You know how if you walk next to someone and they have a little bounce in their step or something you cant help but copy them? well, it was like that.

 

Unfortunately this guy was just not attractive at all. And it's hard to not feel and sound like a shallow cow but he really had nothing going for him. He worked for SA Police doing data entry and it turned out that he keyed in speeding fines. So I offered to pay for his tea if he wiped a few demerit points off my license - he didnt accept my offer, nor did he seem to find it as funny as I did. We were talking in the big Food Court under the Myer centre and he was saying how that at lunch time he had nowhere to go so he would just go to the Library and read old newspapers. So I said "oh, that must be so boring, doing that every lunch break". and he goes "no, I actually enjoy it". Strike '2' for my conversation skills with this one :lol:

 

I was kinda stuck with him so we got some pizza slices from the food court. I dont know if he was really hot or really nervous but he sweated PROFUSELY the whole time. He was constantly wipeing his forehead with napkins and his forearms were really sweaty. You know how when you are so sweaty that things start to stick to you? He went to brush hair or something off his face and as he lifted his arm up, a napkin had half stuck to the sweat so it came flapping up with him. Part of it was stuck to the sweat but the other half of it just kinda 'hung' there. So he's trying to act like it isnt there and I'm trying to act like I havent noticed that there's a napkin half stuck to his arm, or that he's yielded nearly a litre of sweat since we've been there. It was a bit awkward.

 

In the end I got up to go to the toilet and while i was in there I rang mum and asked her to call me back in about 15-20 mins and tell me that dad was sick and I had to go home :lol: . I know its mean but I figured it was better than just not going back to the table.

 

So I went back out, talked to him for however long it took for mum to ring, and it would have to have looked suss cos I was constantly checking my phone, willing it to ring. Then when it did I pounced, said "he's what? , He's sick? oh ok, I'll get it from the chemist.. yes mum, I'll leave right now" then profusely apologised to this guy and took off.

 

The bummer was friday ngihts are late night shopping in town and I so badly wanted to go shopping but I couldnt risk running into him so I made myself go home.

 

Funny, I never heard from this one again <_>

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It wasn't really a blind date but I went on a date with this girl, paid for chilli's, paid to see the new bond movie even though I had told her that I wasn't working at the time and she was... anyways I wasn't interested for various reasons (I wasn't as attracted to her as I had first thought; both looks and personality) and I hate being cruel so I hadn't yet given her a 'hint' or said that I wasn't interested when she started ringing me up and having phone sex, which I thought was just plain sad... then she tried to tell me she was a virgin and she wanted me to take her virginity... after that phone call I never replied to any msgs or calls and that was it hehe

 

In hindsight I could have used a root at the time but I didn't want her clinging or anything...

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omg you didnt tap virgin pussy! shame on you

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omg you didnt tap virgin pussy! shame on you

i reckon she's a blow ass

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omg you didnt tap virgin pussy! shame on you

i reckon she's a blow ass

yeah she was clearly bullshitting... I've been with 1 or 2 crazy girls too, so I'm pretty cautious with these things

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cheddar... hahaha has some great stories... not to bad on the let down etiehr which i think is very nice of you... going to school i hear alot of stories from chicks who are jsut plain shallow and rude... and simply just stand up a guy, or jsut ditch them... which is kinda sad...

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cheddar... hahaha has some great stories... not to bad on the let down etiehr which i think is very nice of you... going to school i hear alot of stories from chicks who are jsut plain shallow and rude... and simply just stand up a guy, or jsut ditch them... which is kinda sad...

 

Yeah, people are shit when it comes to stuff like that... at least you get to see what type of person they really are though.

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cheddar... hahaha has some great stories... not to bad on the let down etiehr which i think is very nice of you... going to school i hear alot of stories from chicks who are jsut plain shallow and rude... and simply just stand up a guy, or jsut ditch them... which is kinda sad...

if some chick done it to me i wouldnt give a shit

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^

 

Yeah that's it... I met this hotty through a gf when we were both blind drunk and she ended up asking for my number, went on a date and she wasn't interested... fair enough I can handle that, then she immediately stops her 10 sms' per day and makes no effort to be nice... I found out a few weeks later that she cut her best friends grass, so lucky I didn't end up with a bitch like that.

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hahaha Cheddar's stories are gold, these guys sound like the kind of guys who trawl the net for flange...

 

In hindsight I could have used a root at the time but I didn't want her clinging or anything...
Just 'finish' up real quick and selfish like, bonus points if you can squirt before you insert, they won't want to hear from you again. Plus you didn't have to break a sweat :beer:

 

I've never seen a chick ditch a guy harshly, only the other way round.. strange

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cheddar... hahaha has some great stories... not to bad on the let down etiehr which i think is very nice of you... going to school i hear alot of stories from chicks who are jsut plain shallow and rude... and simply just stand up a guy, or jsut ditch them... which is kinda sad...

if some chick done it to me i wouldnt give a shit

really?... im shy enough to aska g irl out.. if i eventually did and she wasnt interested id rather her lie ot me... than to ditch me... id be pissed...

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i did that to a chick once.. year 10 formal.. the teachers picked our partners, we didn't get a say, or didn't get to ask chicks we wanted to go with to the formal.. the teachers chose an that was it.. anyway.. i got this cow of a chick.. which i wasn't thrilled about, not because she was over bad looking, there was worse in my year, but she was just fully stuck up and i didn't like her.. but as i knew we didn't have a choice, i thought to myself, just make the most of it.. but no.. this chick fully chucked a turn on .. for 3 weeks every day, we had to practice dancing an whatever and every single time she made a fuss about doing it with me.. so i got the shits about it, since i wasn't thrilled about it either, but i didn't make a scene like she did every other day.. so i did all the dance lessons for 3 weeks, and then i just didn't turn up on the night.. cop that mole! lol

 

btw spaz - thats a bit faggish mate.. lol

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lol if that got me off I'd just walk around squirting on strangers every day and die a happy, convicted man. :)

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